If you want to be more likable and build connections quickly, you need practical tools. Nicholas Boothman’s book How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less offers these tools, and here are the top seven you can start using right now.
1. Adopt a Really Useful Attitude
Choose a positive, warm, and curious mindset before meeting anyone. This attitude shapes your body language and voice, making you approachable and engaging.
2. Master Open Body Language
Keep your arms uncrossed, lean slightly forward, maintain gentle eye contact, and smile genuinely. These nonverbal cues invite trust and openness.
3. Use Deep Abdominal Breathing to Control Your Voice
Breath deeply from your belly to produce a calm, rich tone. Avoid shallow chest breathing that makes your voice tense and high-pitched.
4. Ask Open-Ended Questions
Use questions starting with who, what, where, when, why, and how to encourage others to share stories and feelings, deepening rapport.
5. Practice Active Listening
Show genuine interest by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and giving verbal affirmations like “I see” or “Tell me more.”
6. Tune Into Sensory Preferences
Listen for visual, auditory, or kinesthetic words and adjust your language accordingly to connect on their preferred sensory channel.
7. Synchronize Subtly
Mirror the other person’s posture, gestures, and voice tone gently to create subconscious comfort and trust.
Bonus Tip: Reframe Nervousness as Excitement
Because nervousness and excitement share similar physical signs, telling yourself you’re excited can shift your body language and voice to a more positive state.
By applying these techniques, you will notice your ability to connect and be liked improves dramatically, often in less than 90 seconds.
Sources: 5MinuteBookSummary.com, 20MinuteBooks.com, ReadersBooksClub.com 1 3 4
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