Are You a Nice Guy? 10 Signs and How to Break Free

Take the Quiz and Start Your Journey to Authentic Living

Do you find yourself always saying yes, even when you want to say no? Do you avoid conflict, seek approval, or feel resentful when your efforts go unnoticed? You might be a Nice Guy. Take this self-assessment quiz to find out:

1. Do you avoid expressing your true feelings to keep the peace?
2. Do you believe that being good guarantees love and success?
3. Do you struggle to set boundaries or say no?
4. Do you seek validation from women or authority figures?
5. Do you hide mistakes or flaws out of fear of rejection?
6. Do you feel resentful when others don’t appreciate your efforts?
7. Do you give to get, rather than giving freely?
8. Do you suppress anger or discomfort instead of addressing it?
9. Do you lack close male friendships or mentors?
10. Do you feel invisible or unfulfilled despite your efforts?

If you answered yes to several of these questions, you may be caught in the Nice Guy pattern. The good news is, change is possible.

Start by noticing your approval-seeking behaviors and practicing small acts of honesty. Set one new boundary this week, or share a feeling you usually hide. Remember, authenticity is the foundation of real happiness and connection.

For more resources and support, see these book notes and Tom Heiber's review.