From Resistance to Rapport: How Exactly What to Say Builds Genuine Connections

At the heart of every successful interaction lies rapport — a connection that transforms resistance into openness. Phil M. Jones’s Exactly What to Say reveals how specific phrases can create this bridge.

Starting conversations with phrases like 'I'm not sure if it's for you, but...' immediately lowers defenses by signaling no pressure. This creates a safe space where people feel comfortable exploring new ideas.

Framing questions such as 'How open-minded are you?' appeals to positive self-perception, encouraging people to engage without feeling judged. This aligns with emotional intelligence, which emphasizes empathy and understanding in communication.

When objections arise, responding with 'What makes you say that?' invites explanation rather than confrontation. This shows respect for the other person’s perspective, deepening trust and keeping dialogue constructive.

Motivating through emotional connection using 'How would you feel if...?' taps into feelings, making conversations more meaningful and memorable.

Visualization with 'Just imagine...' invites shared dreams and aspirations, further strengthening bonds.

By using these phrases thoughtfully, you move beyond transactional talk to genuine connection, making influence a natural outcome of trust.

Whether you’re leading a team, negotiating a deal, or nurturing friendships, this approach enhances emotional intelligence and communication effectiveness.

Insights from psychology and communication experts confirm the power of these techniques to build rapport and overcome resistance, making this book a valuable resource for anyone seeking deeper connections. 1 2 3