How to Survive Working with Jerks: Proven Strategies from 'The No Asshole Rule'

Protecting Your Sanity and Self-Worth When You Can’t Just Quit

We’ve all been there: stuck in a meeting with a toxic coworker, enduring the snide remarks or outright hostility of a boss, or feeling the morale drain from an entire team because of one person’s behavior. Robert Sutton’s The No Asshole Rule doesn’t just diagnose the problem—it arms you with strategies for surviving and thriving even in the most challenging environments.

First, recognize the warning signs. Sutton’s 'Dirty Dozen' list—ranging from personal insults to two-faced manipulation—helps you identify when you’re dealing with a true jerk versus someone just having a bad day. Once you know what you’re up against, it’s time to strategize. Physical and psychological distancing are key: move your desk if possible, use headphones, or schedule tasks to avoid direct contact. Creative avoidance—like arriving late to meetings or taking well-timed breaks—can make a big difference.

Building alliances is another powerful tool. Find coworkers who share your values and look out for each other. Document every abusive incident, including dates and witnesses, to protect yourself if you need to escalate the issue. Don’t underestimate the power of humor—sharing a laugh with friends or finding the absurdity in a situation can be a lifeline.

But what if things don’t improve? Sometimes, the healthiest move is to leave. Sutton argues that quitting toxic environments is not failure but self-preservation. If you can’t go, focus on self-care, seek support outside of work, and remember that your worth is not defined by others’ behavior.

Surviving jerks isn’t easy, but with the right strategies, you can protect your spirit and even inspire change around you.