Know Yourself, Know Your Money: Discover Why You Handle Money the Way You Do, and What to Do About It!

From the moment we first grasp the concept of money, our understanding is shaped by the environment we grow up in. Imagine a child sitting at a family dinner table, observing the subtle tension or calmness when the topic of bills or shopping arises. This early exposure, whether through words or feelings, forms the foundation of how that child will relate to money for the rest of their life. In some homes, money is a source of anxiety—parents may avoid talking about finances or display visible stress when paying bills. In others, money conversations are open, calm, and constructive. These contrasting environments are what we call money classrooms, divided into four quadrants: Anxious, Unstable, Unaware, and Secure.

In the Anxious Classroom, money is rarely discussed, but the emotional stress is palpable. Children learn to associate money with fear and scarcity, often feeling the weight of financial worries without understanding the details. Conversely, the Unstable Classroom is marked by frequent money arguments and unpredictability, leaving children feeling uncertain and emotionally whiplashed.

Then there is the Unaware Classroom, where money is not openly discussed, yet the emotional tone is calm. Children here may grow up blissfully ignorant of financial struggles or unaware of the true state of their family's finances. Finally, the Secure Classroom offers a model of healthy money management, where parents talk openly and calmly about finances, teaching children to view money as a tool rather than a source of fear.

What’s fascinating is that even siblings raised in the same household can have vastly different experiences and perceptions of these money classrooms. One child might feel the anxiety clearly, while another perceives calm or neutrality, influenced by their unique personality and role within the family. This diversity means that understanding your own money classroom is a deeply personal journey of self-discovery.

For example, one family might have a tradition of saving every penny, while another might be more relaxed about spending. These early lessons become the scripts we follow unconsciously as adults. Recognizing which classroom you grew up in can offer profound insights into your financial habits and open the door to change.

As you reflect on your childhood money classroom, consider the emotional and verbal cues you absorbed. Did you witness calm, intentional budgeting, or was money a taboo topic? Knowing this is the first step toward understanding why you handle money the way you do today. This awareness is the gateway to breaking free from unhelpful patterns and building a healthier financial future.

Understanding your roots is just the beginning. Next, we'll explore how your unique money tendencies—those natural inclinations and behaviors—shape your financial decisions every day.